Parenthood is often hailed as life’s ultimate adventure—yet no guidebook, advice blog, or well-meaning friend can truly prepare you for the rollercoaster it brings. The hacks that worked wonders for someone else’s child can fall flat at home, leaving you feeling confused and wondering what actually works.
That’s where professional support steps in. Through individual, couple, or family counselling, you can gain clarity and personalised strategies for tackling the ups and downs of family life. Our clinicians have helped countless clients navigate this wild ride, guiding them through family and parenting concerns with greater confidence and support.
Family and Parenting concerns
1. Parenting Styles
In Singapore, where traditional values and modern pressures often intersect, it’s not uncommon for parents to find themselves in a tug-of-war over how to raise their kids. One might be all about academic perfection, envisioning a future of straight-A’s and long rigorous study sessions, while the other believes in the power of play and creativity. When these parenting styles clash, it can leave both parents and kids scratching their heads, unsure of what’s really expected. This disconnect can also turn into a full-blown relationship stress test for the couple, with constant disagreements shaking up the family’s sense of peace and stability.
2. Communication
Communication is the glue that holds families together, but it’s not always easy to keep it from unravelling. In Singapore, as in many Asian societies, many families face the challenge of breaking through communication barriers.
Teens often retreat into their rooms, offering only monosyllabic answers, leaving parents feeling disconnected and frustrated. Meanwhile, couples sometimes get stuck in a rut of talking only about logistics—who’s getting dinner, who’s taking the kids to tuition—and forget how to connect on a deeper level. Before you know it, misunderstandings creep in, resentment bubbles up, and silence takes the place of meaningful conversations. This breakdown in communication can leave everyone feeling distant and isolated, with tension building between family members.
3. Expectations
Expectations—whether from society or within the family—can really crank up the stress levels. In Singapore’s competitive environment, some parents expect their kids to excel academically. But with these high expectations come heavy burdens, and kids can start feeling the weight, leading to self-esteem issues or anxiety.
At the same time, parents may expect each other to fulfil specific roles—like handling housework or spending time with the kids. When those expectations aren’t met, disappointment sets in. The gap between ideal scenarios and everyday reality can stir up resentment and guilt, leaving parents feeling unappreciated or completely overwhelmed. In fact, a 2022 study in Singapore has shown that poor work-family balance (WFB) is linked to higher parenting stress and increased marital conflicts.
4. Family Structures
As family structures evolve, parents may find themselves navigating unfamiliar, often difficult, territory. Take divorce, for example. It doesn’t just affect the couple—it hits the kids hard, too, as they try to adjust to a new family dynamic. Blended families, or stepfamilies, present challenges as kids adjust to new parental figures, siblings, and emotions.
Co-parenting after separation can add even more pressure, as parents figure out how to set boundaries and keep things consistent across two homes. All of these changes can leave family members feeling insecure, frustrated, or even resentful as they struggle to find their “new normal.”
5. Life Transitions
Life transitions are a natural part of family life, yet they often bring significant emotional and logistical challenges. Moving to a new country can be overwhelming for children as they adjust to new schools, make new friends, and find their footing in an entirely new routine, while parents work hard to help them settle in smoothly.
Similarly, having a new baby can bring joy—but older siblings may start feeling neglected or left out. In times of grief and loss, families are often left to grapple with a gaping hole, navigating a whirlwind of sadness and acceptance. These transitions can challenge a family’s ability to stay grounded and connected.
6. Marital Issues
As couples in Singapore juggle demanding careers, household responsibilities, and parenting duties, it’s no surprise that their emotional connection can start to fray. One or both partners may begin to feel neglected or unsatisfied, which, for some, might lead to seeking comfort outside the marriage—an action that can destroy trust and leave lasting scars.
For others, the decline is slower—intimacy fades, and quality time together gets swallowed up by the pressures of daily life. Whether it’s infidelity or simply a lack of closeness, marital issues affect not just the couple, but the entire family, including the kids.
7. External pressures
In Singapore, academic pressure—especially with major exams like the PSLE or O-Levels—can be overwhelming for both students and parents. Kids may feel the weight of expectations and the stress of performing, while parents grapple with providing the support and guidance their children need during this high-stakes period.
Add financial pressures such as managing household expenses, loans, or unexpected medical bills, and the stress becomes even more overwhelming. On top of that, crisis moments—such as bullying at school or an unplanned pregnancy—can leave families feeling lost, scared, and uncertain about how to move forward. These external pressures can really test a family’s resilience and often stretch their support systems to the limit.
8. Family dynamics
Unhealthy family dynamics can quietly chip away at the emotional health of everyone involved. For example, if parents show favouritism toward one child, it can leave siblings feeling overlooked, inadequate, or even resentful. Role reversals, where a child is forced to take on responsibilities usually handled by a parent, can create confusion and frustration as they struggle with tasks they aren’t prepared for.
In some cases, what starts as verbal or physical discipline can escalate into violence. Between 2018 and 2020, Singapore saw a steady rise in enquiries and new cases of family violence. These situations can cause deep and lasting emotional scars, leading to feelings of insecurity and anger, ultimately damaging relationships that were once close.
9. Substance abuse and addictions
Substance abuse and behavioural addictions are tough realities for some families in Singapore, whether it’s the parent or the child caught in the struggle. A parent battling alcohol abuse may become emotionally distant, creating instability and leaving the child feeling insecure. These kids may also internalise the stress of living in a home shaped by addiction, which increases their risk for mental health problems and chronic health conditions later in life.
Similarly, if a teenager falls into vaping or gaming addiction, family life can spiral into chaos. Parents want to intervene and set healthy boundaries, but they worry about making things worse, pushing their child further away or provoking more rebellion. In both cases, feelings of helplessness, guilt, and frustration can be overwhelming, which is why getting professional help is crucial to getting things back on track.
10. Mental health challenges
Mental health issues in children can weigh heavily on parents. A child with developmental disorders like ADHD or autism may need extra support, while disruptive behaviours like impulsivity or conduct disorders can create constant tension. If these conditions go undiagnosed, parents can become exhausted, and siblings can feel neglected.
In recent years, emotional disorders have been on the rise. From 2015 to 2017, calls from children aged 5-9 to the Institute of Mental Health’s (IMH) Community Health Assessment Team (CHAT) hotline spiked more than fivefold. By 2022, 1 in 3 adolescents (ages 10-18) reported struggling with mental health symptoms like depression, anxiety, or loneliness. Teens dealing with these challenges often retreat inward, leaving parents anxious and unsure how to help.
Address family and parenting concerns at Intellect
Counselling acts like a roadmap for navigating family life. It helps you identify the root causes of conflicts—like recurring behaviours—and gives you the tools to make positive changes. These tools may include communication skills, such as active listening and conflict resolution, and expert parenting guidance—whether you’re handling the “terrible twos” or letting your teenager spread their wings.
At Intellect, we offer three types of counselling:
- Individual counselling to heal from past experiences and manage your thoughts and emotions,
- Couple counselling to strengthen your marital bond and enhance your parenting partnership,
- Family counselling to promote open communication and build stronger parent-child relationships.
50-minute sessions with our counsellors and clinical psychologists are priced at $160 and $240 (Singapore dollars) respectively. We offer appointments at our clinics in Marina One, Tanjong Pagar, Woodleigh, and Tembeling.
Whether you’re an individual, a couple, or a family, we all play a role in making family life not just manageable—but truly meaningful.
